The Poor Man: "Bush has nominated Alberto Gonzales to replace John Ashcroft as Attorney General. Yup, that Alberto Gonzales. On the minus side, Gonzales thinks that the Magna Carta is a dangerous piece of judicial activism. On the plus side, he grew up in a two-bedroom house. So it's kind of a rags-to-fascism success story, which shows that the American dream is still alive, albeit with a bit more torture.
Later in the day, Bush is expected to tap Lyndie England to replace Donald Rumsfeld as Secretary of Defense, and later in the week Colin Powell will step down to be replaced by that dog that bit all those prisoners at Abu Griab."